Just make sure that your safe word is "Stop, for I am in a literal swamp of awful." 4 Sex Dice Imagine someone literally pumping your dong full of acid to the soundtrack of the Tasmanian Devil choking on Jell-O while your bed gets soaked with juice, spit, and the fear sweat pooling in your ass crack. And I also know that grapefruits are the opposite of "not acidic at all." How many of those liquids do you want in your urethra or anywhere near your recently shorn scrotum? Now, some reviews of the Grapefruit technique suggest that it's awesome, and that the dudes involved in this fruit stand erotica loved it, so what the hell do I know? Well, I know that hogs and balls are what you'd consider sensitive areas. It sounds like the Sarlacc gagging on a gigantic Dorito which it somehow swallowed sideways. Here's a video that uses actual audio from Angel's demonstration. Without getting too explicit, the gist of grapefruiting is that you wank a dude with a hollowed-out grapefruit while glorping away on the citrus stick. It sounds pretty impressive if you have no idea what a grapefruit is, or even what sex is. In the highly educational video from 2014, Angel describes how to grapefruit your man as though she is sharing the secrets of immortality with Indiana Jones after he got into the Grail room. Also, it's pretty damn NSFW, so if you haven't seen it, you're going to have to Google it. The video in which Auntie Angel describes the method by which someone embeds wiener in grapefruit has become internet history, and is often dismissed as a hilarious piece of sex advice satire. Like Arthur drawing forth Excalibur, some lady drawing forth the wang citrus is the stuff of legends.
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